Monday, January 26, 2009

Peek a Boo - I see You

What a silly baby game that is - my kids used to be convinced that once I put the blanket over my head, I was gone. Squeals of laughter and surprised joy would overtake them time and again as I would lower the blanket and much to their amazement - I WAS STILL THERE! Before I pass judgement too quickly on the sheer foolishness of this childish pastime in my children, I must recognize it in myself. It is often how I relate to God.

When the proverbial sunshine is flooding the halls of my life, of course I am convinced of God's goodness and presence and steadfast love. Truth is, I may not even be compelled to consider it too deeply because I don't really need to. I am being blessed by Him - must be smack dab in the center of His will. It's when the blanket goes over His head (stay with me...) that I begin to wonder where He went. My dark circumstances stir up fear, doubt, a desire to control and comfort and I am only convinced that I want Him back.

Where are you God?

Have you gone from me?

If I quiet my heart for a moment, I hear His answer. I AM STILL HERE.

As God allows for trial in my life - designs it actually in keeping with making me more Christlike - I am growing up enough to realize that He is a Constant - He is still under the blanket. Oh the joy that now floods my soul in confident and quiet trust that He is there even when I can't see Him. I RECOGNIZE His form under the folds and creases.

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